fm Bandit

Reasons why a mother could hate her baby


Reasons why a mother could hate her baby
Summarized from D.W. Winnicott’s 1947 paper Hate in the Countertransference

    1. wasn’t really her idea
    2. it’s not someone else’s kid
    3. “The baby is not magically produced” *
    4. pregnancy can kill ya
    5. interferes with me-time
    6. one’s own mother demands the child in some way
    7. breastfeeding hurts
    8. they offer no gratitude & expect to be waited on
    9. no other option but to love the thing
    10. they seriously bite you
    11. they don’t really get what’s going on, their judgments impartial
    12. “His excited love is cupboard love, so having got what he wants he throws her away like orange peel.” *
    13. baby’s the boss
    14. it’s completely unaware of all you’ve done for it
    15. often prefers the cooking of others
    16. strangers think it’s cute when it’s actually been quite fussy
    17. your failures will manifest in its difficult life, therapy’s expensive etc.
    18. both cannibalism and incest (presupposing these would shut it up) just can’t occur

* Sometimes even the strange blowhard patois of the psychoanalytic theorist is best left unsummarized.

Tagged on: , , , ,

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *